Waiting

OK, so I probably should have updated this a long time ago.  But here goes:

Early in September, I went to pick up my passport from the Canadian High Commission, and got a huge shock. My application for a temporary resident visa (TRV) was denied.  I was in shock.  I've never been denied a visa before, I provided evidence I was legally attempting to enter the country...but actually, all that evidence did was go against me!  That I had a Canadian husband was proof, to them, that I might not return to Jamaica if told to do so.

So, I went home and handed the G the paper listing the reasons for my denial, and asked him what now?  While I left him to think about that, I had to make a mad scramble to un-do all the cancellations of service, my resignation and most importantly, I had to find us a new place to live!

We finally found a new apartment on September 23, after looking at two possibilities in the same neighbourhood where I lived, and some others in other neighbourhoods.  I decided on one close to the office, for a comparable rental but at a much "nicer" postal code.  If I had to uproot myself from the place I had been comfortably established for the last 3 years, well, it needed to be a step-up.

Now we are looking at an "Outland" application for permanent residency, which is going to cost a great deal more, going to take a whole lot longer, and for which we will need medical, criminal and professional evidence that I qualify to immigrate as a member of the family class as a spouse.

G left Jamaica on Oct 6, 5 months after arriving here.  It's been just over a month since he left, and I admit I never thought it was going to be this hard to live without him.  I mean, I lived with him for 5 months compared to years on my own, surely I could just slip back into my former routine?  But no, it's not that easy.  I wake and wonder why he's not beside me, I cook meals he plans for me and wish he was here to do it instead because he did it so well, we talk on the webcam and the phone, and I ache to just touch his hand or kiss his face.  Having known the joy of his presence I can't just pretend it never was.

So I just wait.  I have a feeling I'm going to get very good at waiting before this process is over.